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Danielle. 18. New Jersey.

dggeoff:

dggeoff:

my family got me a vibrating toothbrush that i can most definitely use to masturbate and finally get off gdi but the only problem here is that it’s got mike wasowskis face on it and i don’t know if im ready for that level of commitment

i did it. i did it and i hate myself.

necrophilofthefuture:

a few of my followers asked me to make this rebloggable so here you go!!

thegayswhocouldfly:

so me and my siblings (theres 3 of us) were eating dinner with my dad and we were talking about dad jokes and all of a sudden my dad goes “ive only made 3 jokes in my life and theyre all sitting in front of me”

thats it

the dad joke to end all dad jokes

gayleaf:

you’re not allowed to wear a cotton t-shirt unless you’re a true fan! do you go to the fields and look at it? do you appreciate the agricultural implications of a gigantic cotton industry? do you understand the harvesting process? name 5 cotton harvesting machines. didn’t think so

the-messy-brain-of-mine:

certifiedturtle:

alyssaannfrank:

lovelynobody00:

I wish i actually wore the fashion taste i have

I wish I could afford the fashion taste I have

I wish I had the body for the fashion taste I have

all of the above

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